The Modest Moustache: What's with the Jacket?

This last Fathers Day gave me the chance to reflect on some of the life lessons my dad has taught me.  My dad has always appreciated a modest appearance. Growing up he always taught me to dress in such a way that I would would feel clean, and never feel uncomfortable.

When I was in my first couple years of college, however, I thought I knew better than my dad. I had a beautiful black and cream dress that I loved. To my standard, I thought it was pretty modest. I thought, "Sure, it doesn’t have sleeves, but the straps are thick enough."

One day I was asked on a date to a black tie event by a very attractive young man. He had just gotten home from his mission a few months ago and I was very excited to go. I thought about the dresses I had, and tried a couple of them on to see which one I should wear. I finally settled on the black and cream dress. But worrying about what my dad would say if I wore the dress, I packed it into a bag and changed on the way to meet my date.

I wish I could say that immediately I felt bad or guilty for my clothing choice. But the truth is that I had a good time on the date. I felt comfortable and beautiful in my dress. My date complimented me on my dress as well! A few days later I was invited to a similar event-more casual this time. I thought I knew my standards well enough, and so I wore my favorite jeans and a cute top with, again, thick straps, but no sleeves. This time as I walked down the stairs to get my car keys, my dad walked in the door. He looked at me and then at the floor. He asked, "I hope you wearing a jacket. It’s cold outside."

But I knew my dad wasn’t asking me to wear a jacket because it was cold outside. I knew he was asking me to wear a jacket because my shirt had no sleeves. Annoyed, I went upstairs and got a sweater. He gave me a hug and told me to have fun on my date.

 

As I approached my date, he asked, "What’s with the jacket?" He knew that days earlier I had been fine wearing an immodest dress, and he was now wondering why I had chosen not to on this particular date.

I replied with the same excuse my dad had used. "It’s cold outside."

He told me to ditch the jacket and then we could go. Feeling pressured, I did. The entire night I felt so uncomfortable because I had compromised the Lord’s Standards (what should have been my standards too) and settled for what I thought was "cute" or "beautiful". But I was missing something vitally important—the light of Christ that makes me a daughter of God. That is what makes me beautiful.

I didn’t feel beautiful on my date. In fact, I felt ugly the entire night. I kept trying to find excuses for me to go home. Frankly, from the way my date had reacted about my clothing choice bothered me so much, that I didn’t want to go out with him anymore!

I knew my dad would be disappointed if he had seen my choice to dress immodestly. I also knew that Heavenly Father was sad by the choice I made to turn away from the standards He has given His daughters. The following weeks I thought about my commitment to the gospel and to the Lord. Was I willing to give up the standards of the world and obey the my Father in Heaven's standards?

President Gordon B. Hinckley once spoke to the Young Women of the World,

"Modesty in dress and manner will assist in protecting against temptation. It may be difficult to find modest clothing, but it can be found with enough effort... I do not hesitate to say that you can be attractive without being immodest. You can be refreshing and buoyant and beautiful in your dress and in your behavior. Your appeal to others will come of your personality, which is the sum of your individual characteristics. Be happy. Wear a smile. Have fun. But draw some rigid parameters, a line in the sand, as it were, beyond which you will not go."

Since this experience, I have learned that because I am a daughter of God, I have the sacred privelege to dress modestly, protect my spirit, and become the woman Heavenly Father desires for me to be. It has also challenged me to develop my personality. Dressing modestly has taught me to rely on making friends instead of making an impression. Lifting my standards has lifted me closer to my Father in Heaven.

The Modest Moustache: Intro

The summer is here!  Guess what that means... it's time to review the Lord's standards on modesty. :) 

Too often the world teaches us to base our self esteem on the way we look, instead of who we are.  There is so much I have to write about this subject, so it's going to be a mini series.  

I titled this series of posts The Modest Moustache.   Why?  Because a moustache covers up your face.  It's cleanly trimmed, and neatly combed.  We should dress like a moustache.  We should be covered up, neat, and clean.

First, I wanted to start with this simple statement from the First Presidency of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints...

Reading this made me reflect on some of my clothing choices previous to serving a mission.   Some of my experiences with the principle of modesty will be recorded in this series.  Other posts will be of things I found about dressing modestly that were unique.

 I hope that those who read will take caution in the way they dress and present themselves. 

Even the Flamingos

I had a chance to go to the Zoo with some friends a few weeks ago on our P-day.  While there, we saw a  flamingo who had wandered from the rest of the flamingo clan, just chillin in the pond.  He continued to stretch his neck down into the water, drinking and splashing himself over and over and over and over and over. 

Get the picture? 

  I thought to myself, "how could he be so thirsty when the water is right in front of him?"

As I thought of this thirsty flamingo, it reminded me of some past experiences. 

I grew up a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.  Also known as the Mormons.  During my early college years, I did not know I was thirsty for the Gospel of Jesus Christ.  I thought I could easily find happiness through friends, a good job, and a good education.  I searched and searched but still felt that there was something missing in my life.

Soon I found myself wandering from my daily habits of scripture study and prayer.  I also distanced myself from family members who I had been so close to for so long.  Most importantly, I distanced myself from my Savior, Jesus Christ and my Father in Heaven.

I was thirsty for spiritual water, but couldn't find the pond.

I started a new job, and made an incredible new friend.  Her name is Jenn.  She was actually my boss at work.  She began to invite me to events, and pretty soon we had grown close.  She set a great example for me.  I saw that she still had fun while living standards the Lord had set.  She was happy and thrived on teaching others about the Restored Gospel of Jesus Christ in her Sunday School class.

She told me that she had a desire to serve a mission, had prayed about it, and received the answer that now was not the time for her to serve a full time mission.  But she was a missionary to me.

She led me back to the water that had been sitting in front of my face!  She helped me regain my testimony through her example and friendship.

Jenn put her whole heart into our friendship and showed me where to find the living water of the gospel.  She taught me the importance of daily conversion and daily study.  Those habits are now ingrained in me and I will never again stray from the arms of my loving Heavenly Father.

I'm grateful for my dear Jenn!  I miss her and am so proud of all the wonderful things she has accomplished in her life. 

I hope you read this, and think of someone that you can help lead back to the water that "springs up unto everlasting life."  Even if that person is yourself!

#7: He Weeps With Me

While reading in the Book of Moses yesterday,

I found a tender story that reveals the loving nature of our Father in Heaven.

Enoch is blessed with a vision of the Heavens, in which He sees God weeping.  Confused, Enoch praises God and asks,

"How is it that thou canst weep, seeing thou art holy, and from all eternity to all eternity?  And were it possible that man could number the particles of the earth, yea, millions of earths like this, it would not be a beginning to the number of thy creations, and thy curtains are stretched out still; and yet thou art there, and thy bosom is there; and also thou art just; thou art merciful and kind forever...mercy shall go before thy face and have no end; how is it thou canst weep?"

Enoch sees that God is all powerful; He has all glory, creations, and dominions before Him, yet Enoch sees our Father weeping.  Heavenly Father answers "with all the feeling of a tender parent" and explains His cause for crying.

"Behold these thy brethren; they are the workmanship of mine own hands, and I gave unto them their knowledge in the day I created them; and in the Garden of Eden, gave I unto man his agency; and unto thy brethren have I said, and also given commandment, that they should love one another, and that they should choose me, their Father; but behold, they are without affection."

I can picture our Heavenly Father, pleading with us, "choose me, your Father!" 

For a short period of time in my life, I did not choose Heavenly Father.  I chose another path.  This decision brought me great sorrow. 

One day, the burden I carried became to heavy to bear.  I sat, curled up in my bed, and cried to my Heavenly Father.  I begged for Him to forgive me for turning away from Him.  I asked if He could still even love me.  At this moment, I felt as if my Father in Heaven cried with me.  I knew that He loved me.  He was so sad that I had made poor choices, and He wept with me as I suffered the consequences. 

But just as our Heavenly Father weeps with us in times of sorrow, He also rejoices when we do repent and come back to Him. 

Never underestimate the love God has for you.  He will never abandon you.  He will rejoice in your successes.  He will sorrow in your heartache.  He will weep as we weep.  He will plead with each of us to choose Him, our Father. 

He is the Light

I know Jesus Christ is the Son of God.  I know that I am a daughter of Heavenly Father and that He loves me.  He is my King, my teacher, my Father.  He shows me the path each day. 

His way is the only way.  I am grateful for that.  I am grateful that I don't have to be confused about life.  I have God on my side and He shows me which way to go.

He is my light in the darkness.  He guides my path.

The Ability to Act

Each of us has been given the divine ability to act: to choose how we will think, what we will do, and what we will learn from each situation. 

This is HUGE! 

(so big, I used the biggest font size that blogger would allow me to use, and I also pressed the bold key)

Every day we have to make choices.  Every day people around us make choices.  Life is not about the choices we have in front of us, it's about what we do with those choices. 

Do we idly sit by and just let the world revolve? 

Or do we take an active part in our Heavenly Father's personal plan and move forward with Him in mind?

Our Father tells us in modern revelation,

"It is not meet that I should command in all things; for he that is compelled in all things, the same is a slothful and not a wise servant; wherefore he receiveth no reward."

We should not sit by and wait for the answers to come to us.  We do not learn anything, and we do not receive the reward that Heavenly Father wants to bless us with.  But if we move forward and do our very best to follow His divine commandments, we will receive His blessings and have a greater understanding of His eternal nature and infinite love.  He counsels us,

"Verily I say, men should be anxiously engaged in a good cause, and do many things of their own free will, and bring to pass much righteousness; For the power is in them, wherein they are agents unto themselves. And inasmuch as men do good they shall in nowise lose their reward."

There have been many times in my life, particularly on my mission that I just wait for the Lord to tell me what to do.  In my personal experience, he often tells me to stop waiting and get to work!  I know that Heavenly Father loves us, and because he loves us, He has trusted us to be agents of our own bodies.  It is up to us to decide how to act in each situation.  It is up to us to determine what and who we will be.  The Lord will guide us as we counsel with Him and continue to move forward.

Come, Come Ye Saints

One of my favorite Christian Hymns is Come Come Ye Saints.  It tells the sad take of the early Mormon Pioneers who faught valiantly to establish what they referred to as Zion.  A place of refuge and peace where they were free to worship the God of us all. 

This hymn speaks of courage, fearlessness, and happiness.  Why?  Because with the Lord on our side, He will fight our battles. 

Do I Go Unnoticed?

I live in one of the greatest cities on earth:  Nashville Tennessee.  Boy oh boy is it green here!  Right now it's winter, so, although it's not green, I still live in a region of Nashville known as Green Hills.  Here, I meet weekly with 5 other sets of missionaries every Wednesday morning.  We make up what is called the Green Hills District.  It is possibly (most likely) the best district in Mission History. 

In our trainings today we talked about trusting in God.

I had to give a portion of the training.  It was nothing spectacular, but I shared the following scripture from the Doctrine and Covenants. 

It reminds me of Luke 12:7  "But even the very hairs of your head are all numbered.  Fear not therefore; ye are of more value than many sparrows."

I know that our Savior, Jesus Christ loves us and cares abundantly for us.  I know that He trust us, and He wants us to put our trust in Him and Heavenly Father.

A few years ago, I was struggling.  I was fighting a battle that I felt I could not win.  In an exhausted effort to find any spiritual or mental energy, I went on a drive up one of the nearby creeks and parked at a hiking trail.  I began to walk in the cold summer rain.  It was dark and I didn't know the way very well, but I needed to be absolutely secluded.  As soon as I had gone quite a few steps from my car at the trail head, I wept in frustration.  I did not understand why I was having to fight my current battle.  Tears fell down my face, and disguised themselves in the rain. 

Speaking aloud, I asked God where He had been.  Why had He left me all alone?  Was He even there?  I told Him how badly I was hurting.  I told Him that I could not handle my trials.  I poured my heart out to my Father.

Then, I looked up into the dark sky, and asked, "Where are you?"   

What happened next is a sacred moment that I will carry and cherish close to my heart for the eternities.  I experienced a witness that Heavenly Father is there.  He and His son, Jesus Christ love me.  I will never have to doubt that they are there.  I trust them and love them with all that I am, and want to be good enough to give them all that I have.

This was one of the greatest turning points in my life.  I grew up that day.  None of my problems went away, but I had the Lord on my side.  I trusted Him to guide me the way a Father guides His young child.  Now, when I am hurt, scared, frustrated, or feel alone, I know who to turn to.  I echo the words of the great Book of Mormon prophet Nephi in saying, "Nevertheless, I know in whom I have trusted.  My God hath been my support;  he hath led me through mine afflictions... he hath filled me with his love."

I am not perfect-and though I trust and love the Lord, I still fall short.  When we trust the Lord we are willing to act and do something to show Him our love and willingness to follow Him.  This is where I slip up sometimes. 

I asked many of you (via facebook) how you show your Heavenly Father that you trust in Him...

Russell: "By making decisions that defy man's logic but are obedient to God. Like paying tithing."

Melody:  "Doing His will and not your own, no matter what anyone else thinks of you or how much they persecute you."

Elder Perkins:  ‎"Quote from Henry B. Eyring: 'You show your trust in Him when you listen with the intent to learn and repent and then you go and do whatever He asks. If you trust God enough to listen for His message in every sermon, song, and prayer in this conference, you will find ...it. And if you then go and do what He would have you do, your power to trust Him will grow, and in time you will be overwhelmed with gratitude to find that He has come to trust you.' "

Jenn:  "It's the simple things. Like planting a garden because we know it'll grow; it's paying tithing and fasting and listening to that small prompting that may seem so ridiculous at the time. All of these things we may not see immediate blessings of, but by trusting in God, and being obedient to the small things, we can be clay in our Fathers hands and witnesses of great miracles. The Church is true!"

I know that as we act and show Heavenly Father that we trust Him, we will see Him working daily in our lives.  I know that as we are obedient to His commandments we really will come to understand that He will notice everything in our lives-even down to all the hair I lose due to mission stress. 

If you put your trust in God, you will never feel as if you go unnoticed.

Day #15: How do I pray?

Last night while listening to Brother Halverson speak during Institute, he said the following about how we should worship our Savior:

I thought a lot about the way I pray.  Do I just go through the motions?  Do I just bow my head because I was raised that way?  Why do I get on my knees?  Is it to humble myself before my maker?  Or is it because I've just always prayed that way?

The Lord's Prayer

Christ always taught people to pray.  We read many accounts, both in the Bible as well as the Book of Mormon, where he teaches the people to pray, as well as how to pray.

"Behold, verily, verily, I say unto you, ye must watch and pray always lest ye enter into temptation; for Satan desireth to have you, that he may sift you as wheat.  Therefore ye must always pray unto the Father in my name." (3 Nephi 18:18-19)

Christ taught the ancient people of the Americas to pray to stay away from the dangers of temptation and the awful sin that Satan is constantly exerting upon us.  Prayer can also be a guide for our lives.  It can help us know what direction we should take.

I know in my life, I have turned to prayer often when trying to get answers to questions that I did not understand.  A warm feeling has come over me.  A feeling of peace, comfort, and love.  This feeling lets me know that my Heavenly Father is mindful of me, and it testifies to me every time that Christ is the Savior of the world, and that I am never left alone.  This feeling is ever so clear when I feel like a lost child, or when I need to be surrounded with the Love of my Heavenly Father.  I think often of Jesus Christ, when he was in the most bitter pains known to mankind-I think of his prayer to God.  I think about the sacrifice he made for each of us when he prayed ever so fervently in the Garden of Gethsemane. 

Elder Jeffrey R. Holland, a disciple and modern apostle of Christ's Church bears a beautiful testimony of the night that Christ suffered and prayed to His Father for strength...

"In that most burdensome moment of all human history, with blood appearing at every pore and an anguished cry upon His lips, Christ sought Him whom He had always sought—His Father. 'Abba,' He cried, 'Papa,' or from the lips of a younger child, 'Daddy.^'

"This is such a personal moment it almost seems a sacrilege to cite it. A Son in unrelieved pain, a Father His only true source of strength, both of them staying the course, making it through the night—together."

I know that our Heavenly Father watches over us.  I know that comforts us and carries us when our burdens are too heavy to lift.

If you have ever felt lost, alone, hopeless, depressed-pray.  Pray to the Father in the name of his son.  Pray that your load may be lifted and that His Son, Jesus Christ will carry you through your trials.  I know he has carried me many times through mine.  I love my Heavenly Father more than I can express.  I love Christ-my brother, for his infinite love for me and my family.  I can't wait until I can see them both again, in all their glory.