Many people struggle with self confidence, anxiety, depression, and lack of self esteem.
It can be difficult! I know- I have struggled with them in the past!
This subject has been weighing heavily on my mind lately. I've thought and thought and thought and THOUGHT about how in the world I can help young people who struggle with these insecurities and feelings.
I was reminded of the scripture in Matthew: "Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself." Many of us do love our neighbor. Many of us would do almost anything to please those around us and bring them happiness and joy. Let's flip this scripture around: Thou shalt love thyself as thy neighbor.
So here's the grand question: How do we love ourselves as if we were our own neighbors?
Let me tell ya'll a lil story:
"A young man died, and upon arrival at the Pearly Gates was treated to a tour of heaven and hell before his final assignment. Hell was first, and he was surprised to find it a room of lavish banquet tables, laden with wonderful things to eat. The people there, however, were emaciated and crying out in hunger. The only way to gain access to the food was with extremely long-handled spoons permanently attached to their hands. When they tried to put the spoons to their mouths, they found it impossible to reach. So the residents of this home of the damned cried out in anguish as well as hunger. The young man on the tour averted his eyes in horror. To see these people starving in the midst of plenty was more than he could bear. He begged to be taken away from this place."
Those who were in hell were trapped. They loathed themselves, unable to give themselves the physical nourishment that they needed. That's what happens when we have low self esteem. We are unable to nourish our spiritual, emotional, mental, and often times physical beings because we are so focused on what we cannot have. For those in hell, they were focused on the food they could not eat.
The story continues...
"Imagine the young man's surprise on arrival in heaven when he saw identical tables and identical food. The people here, however, were well fed and happy. There was laughter and music and delight. At first the young man thought that the access to the food must be easier. Then he saw it. The food had to be eaten with the same long-handled spoons. The people in heaven, however, had discovered that the long-handled spoons worked very well to feed the food to each other.
"Energizing love is served with a long-handled spoon. You cannot feed it to yourself. Most of the people in the world believe that you can. They tell you that you must. It becomes an urgency, to 'feel good about yourself,' a strain to admire yourself, a demand to be admirable. This self focus will keep you from peace.
"If you feel hungry for love, grab hold of a long-handled spoon and feed love to others. Miraculously, you will begin to feel love coming directly from your Father in Heaven, which is the purest sort. His long-handled spoon will reach out to you."
I know God is there. I know He loves each of us, and will always reach out to us.
I know He also needs us to be His hands-so that He can reach out to others.
(Story: Confronting the Myth of self-Esteem, pg. 58-59)
I know He also needs us to be His hands-so that He can reach out to others.
(Story: Confronting the Myth of self-Esteem, pg. 58-59)
Sister Valentine, Thanks so much for this wonderful post. All very true, and very needed for myself to hear. It is true, that if we dwell on ourselves we will forever be miserable, but if we lose ourselves in the work of helping others we will be forever happy. For "when you are in the service of your fellow beings you are only in the service of your God." (Mosiah 2:17)
ReplyDeleteAlong those lines, something that I have found useful and actually quite fun, is to think of someone you care about that is going through a hard time, and write them a letter. Then go back and read the letter again. You will be surprised at how much the letter is really talking to you and will help you out a lot. That is because the spirit magnifies the work that you do for others to help you become stronger and closer to God as well. God does love us and wants us to be happy and He will help us as we help Him by serving others!!
Joy. I really needed this right now. I'm so grateful that I have such an amazing friend like you in my life. I'm so proud of you for going on this mission. You are truly an amazing missionary. Your blog has taught me so much. I always look forward to your posts. Thank you for this. I needed this. I love you joy bug.
ReplyDeletelove caroline ;)